Author: anmly_mpusod

Figures in the Sand

S.P. in memoriam                                   

“I draw figures using a short
sharp thorn. on the smooth 
surface of the sand 
it leaves a trace
that is consistent with the thought.
like a print of light feet
freed of sandals, so quietly it comes.
my hands tremble. my limbs
are not as agile as before. but
I have not lived too long. the longer I think
about the world the bigger it appears.
its roundness all the more perfect. 
it slips from my hands
and becomes the substance of thought.

I’ve measured with sand the whole 
of the cosmos. it is possible.
provided that words do not fail
to express the number. and yet  
I am often struck by the thought
that the finitude of space is absurd. 
but what about
infinitude?
surpassing everything it must also exceed
every number and thus every mind. yet 
can the unthinkable exist? rather the opposite, 
I would think. thought is more expansive 
than all of existence. I can
think: Pegasus. everything that my mind 
suggests. Homer.
or Sphinx. like that one
resting in the angular shadow
of the pyramids. wind
rips grains of sand
off their edges. though their disappearance
is not visible to the eye.
Democritus would add: ‘you can also think
the gods!’ on this point I refrain 
from judgment. Protagoras the Athenian 
would have said that the gods did not
create humans, but rather man created gods.
for personal use. and that gods
serve people
like beasts of burden. on their shoulders
man loads the weight of all his transgressions. but
I have not found this in his writings. I do not know whether
he was in fact so profane.
 
I refrain. when I want to understand the world
it is not to remove 
gods. but even without wanting to, I do remove them. 
even though I only crawl, only creep
on the slippery surface of the truth. unable 
to travel its entirety. is truth also
an infinitude?

with sand 
I measure time. it rustles with the beating
of hours. they come foaming
from beyond the horizons.
and they die beyond them. the whole world
and its history and its works
our deeds and our thoughts
all
spill out from the throat of time
as sand.

what is the instant which we christen now? an atom of time
crushed in a quern. between what
maybe will be but is announced in part only. 
and that which is no more. 
but how do I know about the bygone?
the past. a dark cave entrance covered with debris. 
memories. hopes. in what respect
are they different? how would they differ 
without my belief
that I am always
the same?

yes.
my atoms
became weary. no wine makes you as drunk
as time does. if atoms exist 
at all. if they are in fact the fullness
in my emptiness. if they sift in me,
round and glistening. like pearls. am I thus
an hourglass of pearls?
the ones who died where are they? where are their 
roundest atoms?
is somebody’s soul looking at me
from the smooth sand? 
or rather a flake of it? broken down by death? maybe
my faithful Trazippos is here somewhere nearby? he probably
had a soul
or almost did.
true. 
he could not count. but even the king cannot, probably none 
of the rulers can. I submit
that such a soul is in fact
the soul of a slave hamstrung by
lust, rape, intrigue. that soul will not be able
to ascend to the invisible
Palaces of Ether. where thought watches
the harmony of solids,
Pythagorean indeed. is not the hemisphere
the octave of the cone? and is not its fifth 
a cylinder? what a melody it is! though it sounds
out of the ear behind the eye
outside the tongue and lyre.

I cannot
talk about it nicely. the wisdom of philosophers
is not pretty. like a flower of the fig tree
all hidden inside. but what can equal
the fruit’s sweetness?

will my theorem also collapse
into sand? or will another world come
in which these proportions
will change? can I conceive 
that other cosmos? if I wanted to? no. I cannot.
so either that other world is false
or it is too great a truth. to look into it? 
even to get to Egypt
I needed so many days by sail!

no. no. in this I will be eternal even if forgotten.
for is it not true
that the world is indispensable? Epicurus wrote
that the cosmos was always what we see
and such it will remain 
without end. for there is nothing 
outside it or beside it
which could cause it to change. but how,
how to establish
that the cause of a change needs to be external
to what is being changed? after all, 
from my own wish to think
I am changing myself. I am becoming 
the cosmos or a cone. spiral. 
floating wood. submerged as much
as I indicated. if the cosmos
filled with force, like a wise panther,
has a soul
according to the words of Chrysopus
it can be inspired to think itself.
in a different form. 
especially if I can.

moreover, existence
is not the proof of necessity. just like non-existence
shows only contingency. when I close my eyes
without paradox I can think my sand blue. there is 
no absurdity in this.
although maybe there would be if I knew more
about the nature of the sand. so what
is necessary? not a thought, not even a thought.
rather like a rock 
stormed by a thought. but not conquered.
ever. not
permeated.
the din from the harbor
intensifies. what do they want? what
did you want from me? a few toys? siege devices? 
that would fight instead of you? catapults?
their only boast
is that they work. and yet
I would move the Earth.
I could!
if you gave my lever a fulcrum.
I hope no one will discover the point. ever.
the heads
you all could crush! by moving the Earth!
and thanks to me! it is enough
that I let you look into the sun when it burns
wooden ship
on the open sea. though a leaf would suffice
for the sage to see his own face.
or a lump of sand.

I did it.

why did I do it? a smiling sage said 
that the people
have the right to defend their rights, like their walls. 
I, agreeing, will add: the walls even more so.
only under their guard and their protection survives 
the hope for the return of those lost rights.
freedom given by another 
is a worse fate
than bondage of one’s own making. an alien liberator 
is worse than a tyrant born 
within the city walls.

I am drawing circles to reconstruct 
Ariston’s thought. he supposedly
doubled the cube. but today the melody 
escapes me. all mixed up. screams. getting closer.
why are they screaming so loud?
blood. scorpions
squeeze in across the threshold.

I know so little. I do not even know
if space
conceived
measurable with a thought
is identical with the cosmos. if so
does every line consist of atoms and
emptiness? is the excess of points
created by thought? then the problem of the perimeter
would have to have a finite
solution.
I do not believe that. I put
polygons in a circle and can do it
as long
as the precision of my compass allows me.
and the precision of thought exceeds 
that. I want to say—infinitely. 
perhaps only a thought is inexhaustible?
maybe my shelter 
exists only in my thought? in a tale
which I’m telling myself? so maybe
we torment ourselves
unnecessarily? because the world is simpler
than we suppose?”

Archimedes died by the sword
of a Roman soldier. who was looking for treasures. 
but they turned to sand
as he trampled them with his foot. early noon 
shone. on a spring 
day. birds were falling 
stunned by smoke. the soldier
acted against orders.
Marcus Claudius Marcellus, the commander,
ordered his troops to spare the scholar
during the massacre. wanted him
unharmed. he knew that the man
with a mirror
burnt his ships
from a great distance. with Archimedes’s help
the commander hoped
to ignite the ships of others.

 Translator’s Note:

Born and educated in Poland, I’ve resided in the U.S. for the past forty years. In that time, I have translated and published almost one hundred poems in literary journals and anthologies by authors writing in Polish, English, German, and Catalan.

On my visits to Poland, I reviewed many books by contemporary Polish writers looking for a poet to fall in love with who has not been translated into English. Grzegorz Białkowski’s Figury z piasku (Figures in the Sand) surprised and challenged me as a poet and translator. The book consists of two epic poetic cycles: Heraclitean Ponderings (23 poems) and Four Essays on the Nature of Light Based on Well-Known Paintings (4 poems). Two longer poems also are included. The book’s title poem is several pages long, and its closing poem, “Life,” even longer. Each section is written in a different poetic key, showcasing the breadth and diversity of Białkowski’s work. His verse is informed by mathematics, physics, astronomy, ancient history, the arts, and nature. His is the poetry of a self-conscious intellectual, artfully styled with alluring images. “Figures in the Sand” is an excellent example of his range and style. In this persona poem, Białkowski imagines Archimedes during the Roman army’s siege of Syracuse in the year 212 BC, pondering grand mathematical and philosophical questions—right up to the moment of his abrupt death.

Białkowski’s style is distinctive. His line and stanza breaks and punctuation add to the challenge of translation. I remain faithful to the poet’s use of punctuation and his choice not to begin sentences with capital letters, but both syntax and the final word of a given line are often different in English. Some line breaks may look different in translation, but the logic and the flow of the poem are most important in my view, and they remain unchanged. The poet’s approach is both formalistic and creative, formulating the key questions, presenting and pondering them, and working on the solutions. These questions are the same today as they were in Archimedes’ time, driving us on a never-ending quest for meaning that transcends mass violence, cultural misunderstanding and intolerance, and human greed and lust for power. Białkowski saw strong similarities between science and poetry—“they both serve to model reality.” Does something exist if we do not think it? I keep finding myself in conversation with the author of “Figures in the Sand.” Were Archimedes’ thoughts, expressed in his figures drawn in the sand, lost for all time? Was Białkowski’s own effort lost? I hope not: I want his voice to be heard, to reach the ears of English readers.

 

Grzegorz Białkowski (1932-1989) was a Polish physicist, educator, and poet. His poems and prose appeared in prestigious literary journals such as Współczesność, Odra, and Twórczość. Seven collections of his poetry were published by leading presses like Czytelnik and Ludowa Spółdzielnia Wydawnicza. His eighth book, Figury z piasku, was slated for publication in the tumultuous year of 1989, but was shelved and forgotten after his death shortly before he was to be sworn in to the Polish Parliament. In 2015, the manuscript was rediscovered and published by WUW Publishing House.

Danuta E. Kosk-Kosicka is a poet and translator whose work has appeared in numerous magazines and anthologies, including Notre Dame Review, Spillway, Subtropics, and Tupelo Quarterly. Danuta is the author of Oblige the Light (CityLit Press, 2015), winner of the fifth Clarinda Harriss Poetry Prize, and Face Half-Illuminated (Apprentice House, 2015). She has translated four books by the Polish poet Lidia Kosk as well as other Polish poets, including Ernest Bryll, Wisława Szymborska, Stanisław Lem, and Grzegorz Białkowski. Danuta serves as the Poetry Translations Editor for Loch Raven Review. More at: danutakk.wordpress.com.

 

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TWO POEMS OF ILL FORTUNE

Rutebeuf’s Wintertime Blues (adapted from “Le Guignon d’Hiver”)

In this season of the year when the spent trees shed their leaves
To the last spent leaf, I come, stripped by poverty to a similar nothing,
    to sing my wintry tale.
For I would tell you of the small glory I have from God, the King of Glory:
The wits He has given me to live by are not much,
    nor have I much
Vigor of heart to call mine. What I have’s the cold of my body
When the winter wind blows: cold hands, cold ass, cold comfort;
    cold nothing and a cold
Not much to brave the turnings and the buffetings of the wind.
Bad luck keeps its promises; for a lost dime it gives back
    tenfold of dolor.
It sends poverty to glaum onto me again, saying, “Come on in, brother,
My door’s always open, my house is your house and don’t
    you forget it.
Come be drenched by the rain, come swelter in the sun—
It’s what you were born for. God set up the seasons
    so the black fly
Might nip at you all summer, and the white fly in its soft flocks all winter:
Come on down to the bare, brown fields and read your fortune
    in the fallen leaves…”
And so I’m like the willow tree, or the bird on its branch:
From the jig and itch of June to the shiver and moan of January,
    there goes Rutebeuf,
Plucked to the whimpering short hairs with the first hard frost.
The trouble with me is I’m such an innocent—and the tricks 
    I think I know
Get me in deeper faster. You know what they say—
You win some, you lose some? Not at my table.
    The dice don’t like me,
And with their little beady eyes they see me coming. The dice
And the dice rollers, their minions with the nimble fingers.
    So I’m tumbled till the
Lint’s torn from my pockets and the shirt from off my back and I’m
Tossed out on my numb ass in the street and dumped into the sewers,
    where I’m sinking fast,
And who knows if I’ll make it through till spring.
The view from here is that the world’s a pretty foul place.
    All you strutters of your stuff,
How am I to compete, I who have to show for my best efforts
Only the weight of my nothing? On my way to be less than nothing.
    Bad luck and the wintertime blues
Have me and they won’t let go, bad luck and bad company
And the sweet talk of the dice, and what I say now is,
    no more, that’s it.
Because you’d have to be crazy to keep listening to them—
Because don’t think it’s any kind of way up out of debt—
    because what’s bad now
Can get worse. There’s always more threadbare; more barren of hope;
The last door turned away from and not one friend left. Your hurt
    made harsher and your heart hardening.
For how can you love your neighbor when there’s no love for you,
And you’ve no strength to care? The man who used to call you brother
    laughs and says, “So now
You can’t even feed your habit? Well, maybe if you could muster
Some faith—the faith you owe our Savior and the blessed Virgin Mary—
    you might go to market
And ask for a bedsheet on credit; and if they refuse you, maybe 
Trot off to the bank and explain yourself, swear by the archangel Michael
    that all you want’s
The money for the shirt you don’t have on your back and they’d believe you—
Because you’re such a fine, upstanding citizen. And then you could 
            skip on home
In fine new clothes with money in the pockets… Or maybe 
Slink back bare-assed and empty-handed to some hole in the alley wall; 
            which do you think?”
That’s how you’d be talked to eventually. That’s how I’m 
            talked to now.

 

Song of the Street People of the Place de Grève (adapted from “Le Dit des Ribauds de Grève”)

Guttersnipes, God has heard our prayer:
winter’s back. A breeze sifts the trees
for more rags of leaf. On the bare
limbs rain-buds ice-petal a frieze.
Quite the show, if we’d duds to wear—
a fur coat; socks; a new chemise!
All summer, we lolled and took the air;
now, winter’s back! We hunch, we sneeze,
we rub up our poor feet like a pair
of shoes, and rise—to beg, and wheeze.
Farewell, black flies, you’ve had your share
of us. The white ones swirl in their
swarms now, nipping our nose and knees.

 

Translator’s Note:

Any good poet’s work invites discussion of how to read it. With a 13th century writer like Rutebeuf the questions can be unanswerable. We know so little about him! His work is varied. The scholarly pieces would seem to indicate that the “personal” poems, the so-called “Poems of Ill Fortune,” are persona poems. But even if so, in what tone? My grad school professor dubbed Rutebeuf “literature’s first stand-up comedian.” Maybe! But he also means it. The versification is spritely, the tale-telling is rich in sardonic wit, but the humor is fashioned to withstand and deflect mockery, not to invite it. Rutebeuf may well have been of humble origins; he understands the outcast’s suffering; he makes us feel it. My adaptations, as they must, take an interpretive stand. I ignore the long poem’s technical bravura and focus on conversational flow, and on the complexities of voice. In “Guttersnipes,” I imitate the form, but identify the speaker. Critical opinion on this is divided! (Rutebeuf uses “you.” The lines are stripped and the tone uncertain.) Is he a guttersnipe? I say yes. There is critical support for this view. But might he not be the mocking friend from “Wintertime Blues?” In which case, shouldn’t my tone be cutting? I think not; but listen:

Guttersnipes, it’s time. This is where
the leaves get stripped off of the trees.
Your limbs already are that bare?
You’ve shivered? Now it’s time to freeze.
Summer, you lolled and took the air.
Winter—no coat, no fine chemise,
no shoes, only this broken pair
of feet—you hunker down and wheeze.
So long, black flies! They’ve had their share
of you. The white ones swirl in their
swarms now, nipping your nose and knees.

Rutebeuf wrote in a 13th century northern dialect; in grad school, we leaned on the modern French translations by Jean Dufournet. But we did also look at the original texts, which are (with help) not impenetrable, and I went back to them when I constructed my freer versions. The French title “Le guignon d’hiver” is from Dufournet. I don’t think I even read his version of “Ribauds.” My English title for this second poem, giving “dit” as “song” instead of just “poem,” is another interpretive choice. 

Rutebeuf was born some time before 1230, and the year of his death is usually given as 1285. We know little about him. His name is thought to be a nom de plume, though he refers to himself by it quite often in his work. His roots were in the Champagne area of France; he may have been around to watch Joan of Arc liberate Troyes in 1249 (he wrote about it); he lived for many years in Paris. Though he also wrote plays, satires, and hagiographies, he’s best known for the “personal” poems traditionally grouped as Poèmes de l’infortune.

 

Derek Kannemeyer was born in Cape Town, raised in London, and lives in Richmond, Virginia. (While studying in France, he married an American girl who said, “I’m going home, are you coming?”) His degrees are from the Universities of London and Virginia. His writing has appeared in publications from Fiction International to Rolling Stone; his books since 2018 include a prize-winning poetry chapbook, the full-length Play of Gilgamesh, the poetry collection Mutt Spirituals, and a hybrid photography/non-fiction tome, Unsay Their Names, about Richmond’s 2020 Lost Cause statuary removals. Forty of its photographs are on display at Richmond’s Black History Museum. 

 

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Daniel the Super

1.

But I mean—is it pretty, or not
well yeah, it is pretty
so then basically everyone can just enjoy it
nobody’s ever seen anything like it before
those greenish whirlwinds, I just really love em 
you just love em, huh, Dima? 
yeah, I just love em, cause they’re freakin beautiful
so why not love em? 
because they’ll kill us
ah, to hell with em
you mean, with us
with them and with us!
and you remember that one day, when the temperature jumped 40 degrees all at once
I mean there’s a silver lining to everything 
I mean why not

I mean when you get right down to it
once it was plague, now it’s the climate, what’s the big deal
so look
if we eat every day like we’re eating now, if we drink every day like we’re drinking now
then we have enough booze for eighteen days
and enough chow for fifty days
to be honest, I never did see the point

dang, everything’s just changing right there in front of us! It looks amazing!
Just itchin to get out my iphone ha-ha
I know right? me too gonna post it on Instagram ha-ha
you got a real nice view up here Tanya
whew, gotta go barf, can’t take it
always feelin like I need to barf
well that’s cause you’ve got a fever, Vitya
jeez everything around here’s got a fever it’s not just me
nah it’s cause of the stink
I’m sick of that constant stink 
it might be pretty to look at, but I don’t like that stink
that stink kind of ruins everything
well excuse me but what can you do
we’re dead, so here we are, stinking up the place
I’m saying that, like, on behalf of Vasilyeostrovsky’s former residents 
oh man, dang, get this, I was even headed out there that day
but I was running late, it was a miracle 
everybody’s got a story like that

hey now Tanya, I’m sorry if I said anything
don’t cry hey now why are you crying
they never knew what hit em, they didn’t suffer, and you did it knowing what you were doing
and the government approved it, too
we did nothing wrong

Tanya, Tanyukha, you gotta understand, it would’ve been worse for them here
let alone the kids under five, there’s no way, seriously
seriously, don’t even think about it anymore
you didn’t do anything, it’s not your fault, seriously, that’s why the government did it
it issued us those pills, and that’s why 
so we could—

it’s those irresponsible mothers, though, they’re the ones who—
what do they think’s going to change, seriously, makes no sense
if I had kids, I would’ve done it a long time ago
it’s immoral, egotistical, to let them live now

no, it’s all good, though
the human race has always lived like this
the end of the world’s just business as usual
no use being afraid, we’ve known this was coming
the ones who did this to us, though, they’re the ones should be afraid
they’re the ones burning in hell right now 
but we’re gonna live the way we wanna live
you know, blessed is he who visited this world during its fatal moments
we’ll lock ourselves in and let the plague rage

oh crap, that’s the super at the door  
jeez he’s gone off his rocker about that damn generator
don’t let him in
oh, shit, what’s he doing
he’s got a gun
Tanyukha, get down on the ground
Vitya, dammit, stay behind the—
aaaaah

2.

I told them over and over again, these days you can’t do that anymore 
you need food, you need water, you need to guard the supplies
they didn’t listen to me, not one fucking word
they set fire to the new electrical line 
stuffing their faces the whole time like I don’t know what
dug up some booze, stole some food, and locked themselves in, back on the fifteenth

well who cares, they’re just trash
people like that are useless these days
never gave a thought to their souls
they’d have only gone on and sinned even more
so you could say I really just saved them 
letting them live would’ve really just been immoral

me and the lady from apartment sixty-eight were talking
about when the time comes to do what they gave us those pills for 
when they issued them, a year and a half ago
there was a wave of suicides
and some people even thought that was exactly why they gave them out
to get rid of the excess population
all those whiners, the “I’m so depressed” slackers 
who couldn’t do anything anyway
but time’s ticking away, see
and everybody’s still got their pills
everybody but the ones who sold them for food
and so now the question, you know, arises
when is it time
the authorities didn’t inform us of this
left it up to our own judgment
they must’ve predicted that at some point we’d just know, all at once 
although we did know, just not all at once 
or rather, we’ve known for a long time now, 
but we don’t know when exactly  
there’s nothing about this in the instructions
so here we are, sitting and waiting

personally I think you have to if it’s like a kid
if a kid is suffering unbearably
like if a kid’s got a bad infection or something
used to be able to cure all that but what now
as for the grown-ups, well
when it’s not just one more time the water rises higher than the Petersburg dam 
when the water doesn’t stop once it’s hit our old five meters forty centimeters, but it goes and hits ten meters, fourteen meters 
that’s up to the fourth floor
or when there’s a temperature shock like there was in February
but without getting back to normal
if it really gets scorching hot like that, then I’m definitely just going to do it straightaway

but that lady from apartment sixty-eight
she says there’s no way she’s gonna kill children on the government’s orders
she says to just go on ahead and die however we die  
just go on ahead and drown
or starve, or freeze, or whatever
although we all know there’s a fat chance of freezing now
fat chance of freezing now
but the main thing is to just let it take its course
that’s the important part, even if we do all suffer a little
everyone has suffered, after all
the middle ages had its apocalypse too 
the plague, for instance
and there were other things too, earlier, it’s been proven  
but nothing happened to us, and nothing’s going to happen to us
even if there’s nobody left
a couple weeks, a month, the terminal stage
but the main thing is not to let things fall apart
if you don’t let things fall apart
then nothing’s going to happen to us, not really
even if the planet ceases to exist 
even if there’s nothing left, we’ll still

I don’t know how I can be so sure
maybe I’m just an idiot, of course
but I firmly believe this

because the main thing isn’t how it all goes down 
the main thing is that I’m the one responsible for this building
because I’m basically like the building supervisor
if somebody didn’t crank the generator enough, it’s my fault
if there’s no clean water, it’s my fault
or if we run out of ammo and we’re robbed

but as for this climate scheme, now I’m not so sure that’s my fault
it was that thing, where they pumped all that dang gas into the atmosphere
it’s all because of that
they wanted to make things better, but they made things even worse
they could’ve just let it slide, we’d’ve made it another hundred years, maybe two hundred
but no, they decided to make some money on it
profit from everyone’s fear, from the climate panic
I didn’t vote for them at the referendum
and that referendum was shit anyway 
carousel voting, ballot stuffing 
even back then I wouldn’t touch plastic bags, even back when everyone figured
it was okay, it was convenient

(oh and by the way, here’s a funny thing about plastic bags: the kids play on the fifth-floor landing
filthy little things, they can’t go outside there isn’t any outside anymore
and so anyway they play bloody knuckles with coins
where the coins have survived a hurricane 
only to have to flee from a huge monster: a plastic bag
plastic bags are the main villains in kids’ games these days
kids think all this is because of plastic bags)

I basically tell everyone not to panic
everything’s okay
the end of the world is okay
there’s nothing to be worried about
it was all preordained, decided in advance
the ones who created this climate scheme are burning in hell now
and as for us
well, we’ll live out our lives the way we want

yeah, about those drunks from the fifth floor
so basically, before we recycled them
we displayed them to the sect in apartment twenty-nine
they have a commune in there
a hundred and eighteen people in it
all cultists, and there’s even pregnant women
which is taking it too far, no doubt about it
they shouldn’t have permitted that level of optimism
but they do have a hydroponic farm, that’s good
it’s been really tricky to restock our supplies lately
first of all, it keeps getting hotter and hotter 
and also, out in that new sun
you can see your skin burning in that new sun, even under your clothes
and secondly, everything’s run out, the water’s getting worse and worse
we have to really look for it and ration smaller and smaller portions
that’s the reality of it
and thirdly, there’s no more respirator masks, haven’t been for a long time now
I’m not so sure that a scarf is a good enough replacement
for a stench like this

but those are little things, we can deal with them

so basically, we go over there
Roma’s standing there holding a drunk’s head, Jamshaid’s standing there holding a drunk’s head,
and I’m standing there with a lady drunk’s head, holding it by the hair
and at that point I kinda flipped out, of course
as soon as they saw me, they all stood
and started chanting, thundering in unison

                   Daniel, Daniel
                   be our king
                   here in the ravaged city
                   destroy the flow of time
                   make it curl up and swallow itself whole
                   make it feel hard, black, and endless
                   from one minute to the next
                   make it feed us
                   make it defend and protect us
                   here in the ravaged city
                   time is all we have left
                   time is our food
                   time is our weapon
                   inside every endless minute 
                   which has curled up into itself
                   be our king
                   Daniel

and I’m standing there with a lady’s head
I’m standing there and I want to tell them something useful 
something practical 
I could’ve told them a lot of things
but I keep not speaking
and the pause keeps getting longer

 

Управдом Даниил

1

А вообще скажи — красиво
так да, красиво
так-то по идее можно всем просто наслаждаться
такого никогда и никто еще не видел
вихри эти зеленоватые, я их прям люблю
ну прям любишь, Дим?
Да прям люблю ну красивые же ё-маё
почему нельзя их любить?
Потому что они нас убьют
ну и хрен с ними… 
ты хочешь сказать, с нами
Хрен с ними с нами!
а когда за день, помнишь, потеплело на сорок градусов сразу
да всему можно радоваться
да почему нет-то

да в конце-то концов
ну что, была когда-то чума, теперь климат
вот смотри
если каждый день мы будем пить как сегодня и закусывать как сегодня
то бухла у нас хватит на восемнадцать дней
а закуси хватит на пятьдесят
честно — я никогда не видел смысла…

бля, там все на глазах прям меняется! какие картинки!
Прям руки тянутся к айфону… ха-ха
да-да, точно, меня тоже. Запостить в Инстаграм, ха-ха
у тебя хорошие тут виды Танюха
уф, пойду поблюю сил нет
все время блевать хочется
Витя да у тебя температура
да тут у всего температура, не только у меня
да это у него от вони
эта вонь непрерывная меня достала
визуально красиво, а вонь мне не нравится
вонь немножко все портит
ну извини, что тут поделаешь
мы мертвые, вот и воняем
это я тебе от лица бывших жителей Василеостровского района
да, бля, прикинь, я в тот день собирался на Васю!
Каким-то чудом опоздал
у каждого из нас есть такая история

ну ты Таня извини если чего не так
не реви ну чего ты ревешь
им больно даже не было ты же сама осознанно
да и правительство дало добро
это не преступление

Танюха им бы хуже было здесь, пойми
а младше пяти так и вообще тем более 
даже можешь просто вообще не думать
ты вообще не виновата правительство для того
нам эти таблетки и выдало, чтобы

это вот они — мамашки безответственные
непонятно, на что они надеются вообще
если бы у меня были дети, я бы тоже уже давно
давать им жить сейчас безнравственно и эгоистично

да всё нормально, вообще
человечество всегда так жило
конец света — это норм
ну чего нам бояться все это было уже давно понятно
пусть боятся те, кто эту аферу устроил
вот они теперь жарятся в аду
а мы будем жить так как мы хотим
блажен кто посетил сей мир
запремся от чумы…

о чёрт, управдом ломится
ну реально задрал со своим генератором
не открывай ему
а, шит, что он делает  
у него ствол
танюха ложись 
бля Витёк не выходи оттуда
ааа

2

я им говорил много раз, что в наше время так нельзя
еда нужна вода нужна склад надо охранять
они меня нихуя не слушали
поджигали проводку новую
при этом жрали как не в себя
добыли бухло жратвы натырили закрылись еще с пятнадцатого

ну чего там поганцы просто
бесполезные люди в наше время
не думали о душе совсем
они бы успели нагрешить ещё сильнее
так что можно сказать я их просто спас
оставлять их в живых просто безнравственно

У нас разговор был с женщиной из шестьдесят восьмой квартиры
когда наступает этот момент, ради которого нам таблетки-то раздали
полтора года назад, когда их раздали
был всплеск суицидов
ну и было такое мнение что их раздали как раз для этого — 
чтобы избавиться от лишнего населения
от унытиков всяких бездельников в депрессии
все равно ничего не сделают
но видите, время идет
а таблетки у всех есть
кроме тех, кто их перепродал за еду
ну вот и, блин, возникает вопрос
когда пора
про это власти нас не предупредили
оставили на усмотрение
видимо, был прогноз, что все как-то сразу станет понятно
а оно стало понятно не сразу
вернее, понятно-то было уже давно
но непонятно, когда именно
в инструкции этот момент не указан
и вот сидишь сидишь

лично я думаю, что пить их надо, если ребенок там
если страдает там уже совсем
кишечная инфекция там или что
раньше-то это все лечили а счас как
ну а взрослым, там, когда не очередные пять метров сорок сантиметров и дамба-амба
а уже все десять или четырнадцать, допустим
это уже четвертые этажи
или как в феврале температурный удар
но без возвращения обратно к нормам
вот если начнет реально поджаривать, тогда я точно лучше сразу

а та женщина из шестьдесят восьмой квартиры
она говорит, что вообще не будет убивать детей по указке правительства
говорит, что надо спокойно помереть всем как придётся
утонуть спокойно
или там от голода или холода или чего
хотя от холода уже вряд ли, теперь понятно
от холода вряд ли
но главное, своим ходом
ну, важно это, даже если помучиться
в конце концов, все мучились
в Средние века тоже бывал апокалипсис
чума, например
и раньше, доказано, тоже бывало
но мы все никуда не делись, и никуда мы все не денемся
даже если никого не будет
пара недель, месяц — терминальная стадия
но важно не допустить развала
и если его не допустить
то мы действительно никуда не денемся
даже если планета перестанет существовать
ничего не будет — а мы…

не знаю откуда у меня эта уверенность
может я тупой, конечно
но я в этом уверен

потому главное не то, как все случится
главное другое: что за дом отвечаю я
потому что я вроде как управдом
когда генератор не докрутили — я виноват
когда воды нет чистой — я виноват
или если патроны кончатся и нас обнесут

а вот насчет климатической аферы — тут я не уверен, что я виноват
вот с этой закачкой газа в атмосферу, блин
это все из-за нее
хотели как лучше, а ещё хуже сделали
могли бы спустить на тормозах и еще протянули бы лет сто, двести
нет, решили заработать
на общем страхе панике по поводу климата
я их не поддерживал на референдуме
да и блядский был референдум — вбросы и карусели
я не брал в руки пакетов ещё тогда, когда все считали
что это норм и удобно

(про пакеты кстати смешно: дети играют на площадке выше пятого
грязнющие, на улицу нельзя… ее больше и нет
и вот короче  они играют в монетки
которые спаслись от урагана
и теперь удирают от огромного монстра, полиэтиленового пакета
у нынешних детей полиэтиленовые пакеты в игре главные злодеи
они считают, что все из-за них)

в общем я говорю всем: без паники
все это нормально
конец света — это нормально
тревожиться не о чем
все это было решено и предопределено
авторы климатической аферы теперь жарятся в аду
а что касается нас
то мы проживем свою жизнь так, как хотим

ну а тех алкашей с пятого
в общем, прежде чем утилизировать
мы продемонстрировали их сектантам из двадцать девятой
у них там община
их там живет сто восемнадцать человек
коммунары, ещё и беременные есть
что уже, конечно, перебор
такого оптимизма не стоило бы допускать
но у них есть ферма на гидропонике — это неплохо
обновлять склад в последнее время очень непросто
во-первых становится жарче и жарче
да и на солнце этом новом
на нем приметно так сгораешь даже под одеждой
во-вторых все кончилось вода все хуже
приходится искать, распределять все меньшие порции
такова реальность
в-третьих, респираторов тоже давно нет
не уверен что шарф нормальная замена
при такой вони

ну это детали с этим можно справиться

в общем мы пришли
Рома стоит с башкой алкаша Джамшут стоит с башкой алкаша
я стою с башкой алкашки за волосы держу
и тут я немного прифигел, конечно
они все увидев меня встали
и такие хором как грянут

Даниил, Даниил
будь нашим царем
среди разрушенного города
уничтожь течение времени
чтобы оно свернулось внутрь самого себя
чтобы оно от минуты к минуте
казалось нам твёрдым чёрным бесконечным
чтобы оно само питало нас
защищало и охраняло
среди разрушенного города
время это всё что у нас осталось
время наша пища
время наша оборона
внутри каждой бесконечной минуты
которая свернулась сама в себе
будь нашим царём 
Даниил

а я стою с башкой

стою и хочу что-то сказать дельное
практическое что-нибудь
много чего я мог бы им сказать
но пауза длится длится
и я молчу молчу

 

Translator’s Note:

Ksenia Buksha’s writing is fearlessly hermetic one minute and movingly accessible the next. No one else sees the world as she does; reading her prose and poetry expands my net of perception. When I asked Buksha in 2020 if she had any new shorter work, she took the extraordinary step of writing “Upravdom Daniil” (“Daniel the Super,” in my translation) in answer. Although the text’s form is unusual, the effect is palpable—the dialogue is so real you can practically smell Dima and Vitya in part one, reeking of sweat and papirosas. The first part has three narrators, the men Dima and Vitya and the woman Tanya, while the second part is told by Daniel himself. The story is seasoned with a pinch of unexpected humor and garnished with unsettling details like postapocalyptic children’s games (Buksha is one of the best contemporary writers about young children I know). 

There is no narrator here. All is dialogue (or monologue, or even surreal choral recitation). Although the Russian spoken by Daniel, the building supervisor, is a little more formal (bigger words, not as many colloquialisms), the texture of everything here is rough and intimate; up until the surprising end, many of these lines seem as though they could have been overheard on the bus, or in the building elevator, or at the kitchen table over beer and vobla. Like other languages, Russian can indicate the subject of the sentence in the structure of the verb, without having to explicitly state the subject; that, on top of the laconic, elliptical style Buksha employs here, made the tone delightfully tricky to render. I am grateful to fellow Russian translator Josie von Zitzewitz for her perceptive warnings against overtranslation (unnecessary expansion or explicitation) in an earlier draft of this translation.

All Buksha’s writing is richly intertextual, and “Daniel the Super” is no exception. The name Daniel, particularly in the context of this narrative, calls to mind the apocryphal text known as the Apocalypse of Daniel; and it is, of course, the prophet Daniel who, in the Old Testament, reads the writing on the wall foretelling King Belshazzar’s doom. The “blessed is he” quotation is a famous line from metaphysical Russian poet Fyodor Tyutchev’s 1829 poem “Cicero.” In my translation, the “super” of the title means “building supervisor,” not “superhero,” although the moment of dissonance resulting from the latter interpretation is a nice little bonus for readers of the English. Equal parts prose poem, dramatic monologue, and horror movie, Buksha’s piece is a thought experiment on the nature of responsibility vs helplessness, and might be read as a prophetic warning itself, with a final in-your-face flourish more reminiscent of Salome and John the Baptist than of Daniel the Old Testament prophet…

 

Poet and fiction writer Ksenia Buksha was born in what was then Leningrad in 1983. Trained as an economist, she has worked as a business journalist, copywriter, and day trader. Author of over a dozen books of prose and poetry, Buksha has twice been short-listed for Russia’s Big Book award and is the youngest writer ever to win Russia’s National Bestseller award. Her most recent novel is Advent (2021), published in Yelena Shubina’s renowned series showcasing the best contemporary Russophone literary fiction. 

Anne O. Fisher translated Ksenia Buksha’s award-winning novel The Freedom Factory (Phoneme Media/Deep Vellum Publishing, 2018). Her translation of Sigizmund Krzhizhanovsky’s “The Poetics of Titles” is forthcoming in Countries That Don’t Exist (Columbia UP). In 2020, Fisher and co-translator Alex Karsavin were awarded a RusTrans grant to support their work on Ilya Danishevsky’s queer modernist novel Mannelig in Chains. Fisher’s favorite factoid is that the males of some species of dance fly create nuptial balloons. Read more (about Fisher’s translations, not about nuptial balloons) at anneofisher.com. 

 

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Dwelling

This cheetah in my fingers

is not enough,
its speed macerated
in distilled sediment, 
its body in a torrent, 
breaking loose— 
from the stilled water
in this cup,
walls unflowing, 
a row of girls 
in their beds, 
runners that dream 
about a soft wind 
and emit a whistle 
like a slow boil,
low heat 
in the kitchens 
of the world. 
Inject yourself with lime 
from these walls, 
slow what’s fast, 
tuck yourself within the metal 
of the key, 
listen to the low flight 
of the rooftops, 
their corralled animal 
migration announcing
a new station
freely upon arrival
in the steppes.  

No basta el guepardo 

en los dedos, 
su carrera macerada 
en el alcohol 
del reposo, 
el cuerpo en torrente, 
desbocado, 
del agua detenida 
en esta copa, 
no fluyen los muros 
de clausura, 
una fila de niñas 
en sus camas, 
corredores que sueñan 
con un viento de superficie 
y emiten un silbido 
de hervor ralentizado 
en las cocinas 
del mundo, 
a fuego lento, 
hay que inyectarse la cal 
de estas paredes, 
aquietar la voz, 
recluirse en el metal 
de la llave, 
escuchar el vuelo bajo 
de los techos,
su migración de animal 
acorralado que anuncia, 
sin pausas de contención 
en la llegada, 
una nueva estación 
de las estepas.

 

We fish for color

with a net of rain 
around the neck
of the house. 
It’s clearing up 
in the next room,
the breeze rustling the curtains 
means it’s time to travel,
and on the carpet 
we remember the animal 
as a lone piece 
from a game won 
in stillness. 
We’ve all forgotten the race, 
the whistle reaches all our ears 
we’ve conquered our obstacles 
like foals with unsteady hooves 
over newborn white rocks. 
The riverbed’s truest course 
is slow immersion.

Pescamos el color 

con una red de lluvia 
en torno al cuello
de la casa. 
En este otro cuarto 
ya clarea, 
se anticipa el viaje 
en el vaivén 
de las cortinas, 
sobre la alfombra 
recordamos al animal 
como pieza única 
de un juego que se gana 
en lo inmóvil. 
Se olvida la carrera, 
un silbato para cada oído 
se asumen los obstáculos
en las pezuñas vacilantes 
de los potros 
sobre las crías blancas
de las piedras. 
Lenta, la inmersión 
es el abajo del río. 
Su cauce más sincero.

 

She went about burying him,

transplanting 
his loosened leaves
in the interior garden, 
one by one. 
The naked sap rose up, 
and the erasure was a canvas 
of thread, smooth to the touch 
and without color. 
She went about digging 
in the dampened earth, 
her anger gone,
laying his feet at rest,
as though he were still
a child lost in thought.
Seated on 
the mulch, 
rain, mist, vegetal 
scent, 
her change
emerged with the quiet,
without a right flank 
nor left eye, 
without leaks
or edges.

Fue enterrándolo,

transplantando
al jardín interior,
una a una, 
sus hojas desprendidas. 
La savia manaba vertical 
en el desnudo, 
y el borrado era un lienzo 
de hilo, de tacto suavísimo 
y color incierto. 
Fue escarbando sin rabia 
en la tierra humedecida, 
introduciendo sus pies
de niño absorto
en el descanso. 
Sentada sobre 
el mantillo, 
siendo lluvia,
vaho, olor 
vegetal, 
fue en la quietud 
el desarrollo,
sin flanco derecho
ni ojo izquierdo, 
sin fugas
ni contornos. 

 

I bathed

on the water’s surface, 
my throat burning
with choked 
sound, 
my body in slow descent, 
suspended from 
some piece of wood. 
I submerged myself
in the reflection of the pond, 
soaring
in a leap of heights 
without weights 
or measurements, 
boats and lighthouses 
at rest.
Growing dizzy,
I lifted the water’s hair 
and braided it 
without getting wet, 
and below 
the workers continued, 
baking breads 
from ash.
My feet are learning 
their alphabet,
I punctured the cloud 
from here in the nucleus,
and now I’m flooded
by a white hemorrhage 
when I walk.

Me he bañado

por encima del agua,
con la llama del sonido
sofocado,
con la caída lenta
y en suspenso 
de un objeto diminuto, 
de madera, 
me he sumergido
en el reflejo del estanque, 
sobrevolando, 
en un salto de altura 
sin pesos ni medidas,
barcos y faros 
en reposo, 
he tomado con vértigo 
los cabellos del agua,
los he trenzado
sin mojarme,
y abajo seguían 
trabajando,
horneando los panes 
de ceniza, 
he punzado la nube, 
desde el núcleo, 
y ahora que los pies 
aprenden su alfabeto, 
me inunda al caminar 
una blanca hemorragia. 

 

Translator’s Note:

Esther Ramón, born in 1970, lives in Madrid, where she taught one of my very first writing workshops at various café tables in Lavapiés more than a decade ago. She skillfully introduced me and fellow students to what it could mean to truly collaborate, to be interdisciplinary, to go beyond looking at a painting while writing a poem and, instead, enter into the methods and mindsets of different mediums, seeing the world not only in a different language (in my case) but with a more creative intention. She continues to collaborate with other artists, and it feels meaningful to translate her work—in a sense collaborate too—and become involved in her poetic world so many years later.

In Morada (Dwelling), published in 2015, Ramón presents our human participation in and collaboration with nature, beginning with the simplicity of seeking shelter, and even moving to burial and decomposition. In her description of this collection, she writes: “The first and last refuge is a hole — excavated by hand — in the uncomfortable earth.” Her litanies of incongruous images in short lines are full of movement within and through uncomfortable interiors: “… an aroma that spreads / through the hair / through the buckets of rice / through the musical carpet / through the flasks, / inside the bedroom / and nothing burns.” One challenge of short lines is the quantity of articles and prepositions that need careful placement in English. The movement of images easily chokes on small bits of grammar, and in my drafts I ended up with lines made up entirely of prepositions and articles as I shifted things around. 

Translating this volume, I can’t help but keep thinking of Gaston Bachelard and The Poetics of Space, and I’ve been trying to keep the imaginative interior as a central figure while I work. These poems take us through physical, yet dreamlike spaces we have a sense of, but no real concrete grasp of. As readers, we are allowed to surface our own dreams and subconscious. The absence of a strong “I” in nearly all the poems in this volume creates a centering of space as the main figure or character. Beyond that, it also creates a sense of collective, observed experience. Ramón intentionally avoids an active agent for her verbs, she focuses on infinitives and passive constructions. I have found myself turning to imperative verbs in English, like musing internally to oneself, or to no one in particular. That these words dwell in our own interiors, as readers, is what matters.

 

Esther Ramón is a poet, critic and professor from Madrid, Spain. She has published nine volumes of poetry, and earned the Premio Ojo Crítico in 2008. Her poems have been translated from Spanish into various languages and she appears in the US anthology Panic Cure: Poetry from Spain for the 21^st Century (Otis Books, 2014). She has been coordinating editor for the journal Minerva, director of radio poetry programming for Radio Círculo, and is currently a professor at Universidad Carlos III in Madrid. 

Emma Ferguson is a poet, translator, and educator from Seattle. She has been a scholarship recipient for the Breadloaf Translators’ Conference, and is currently translating the collection Dwelling (2015) by Esther Ramón, among other projects. Most recently her translations can be found at Columbia Journal and The Offing and forthcoming from The Common, while her poems can most recently be found at The Bookends Review and River Heron Review, and forthcoming from Rock & Sling and Passengers. She grows vegetables, brews beer, and plays piano. 

 

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